I got to know Amanda, who is now a dear friend, when we happened to be placed in the same college Spanish class during our sophomore year. This class, which was only available in painful, once a week, four hour long installments, had one saving grace, the man who taught it. Our beloved Professor Rendstrom, spent as much of the four hours teaching us how to navigate the subjunctive as he did speaking out against “the Man” while fingering the tip of his long, flowing ponytail. And when our much-anticipated half-time breaks finally arrived, Rendstrom would look up, reach for his pack of cigarettes, and say “OK. Smoke-um if you got-em”. Which of course has become a standing joke that Amanda and I share whenever our paths happen to cross.
This morning I embraced the sentiment of “smoke-em if you got-em” in my kitchen. Having been stuck in the house all weekend with some kind of icky respiratory illness, I hadn’t planned on meals and my only options were whatever was around. A quick survey concluded that I had three eggs, an avocado, a lime, and an onion (both on their last days), a bit of cilantro, a can of pinto beans, and a small amount of goat cheese of questionable age, that was thankfully free of mold. Smoke-em if you got-em!
I squeezed the lime over the avocado halves (for flavor and to prevent them from turning brown) and chopped them into small pieces.
I sliced the onion and put it in a saucepan over low to medium heat with a little sugar to make quick caramelized onions.
I topped the egg base of an omelette with all of the ingredients, allowed them to get hot, and there you have it. A perfect Sunday brunch, improvised.
Topped with a dab of hot sauce, it was tasty and satisfying and there was more than enough there for the two of us to share. Rather than provide you the recipe below, I will instead make a list of some other fun combinations that you might try, using ingredients you happen to have handy.
The “Smoke-um If You Got-um” Omelette
Required:
3 eggs, beaten (less if it’s just you, more if you have additional people)
salt and fresh ground pepper
olive oil
Potential ingredients:
Beans – red, black, pinto, refried, even lentils or chickpeas
Cheese – really any will do, it’s your preference
Veggies – tomatoes, sauteed spinach, onions (caramelized or raw), green peppers, cooked broccoli, asparagus, roasted red peppers, garlic
Fresh herbs – dill, cilantro, parsley, basil, oregano, rosemary
Meat – chorizo, proschutto, salami, sausage, ham, bacon, pancetta, smoked turkey
Other: olives, capers, hot sauce, ketchup








